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The Devil's Calendar

from I've Got a Fire by Englewood

/

lyrics

The devil woke up this morning, said "Who's it to be?
There's some women out there who are too organized for me.
They bring home the bacon, fry it up in the pan.
I'll show them who's boss -- tomorrow I'll start with Pam!"

I need a few hours to work it all through.
Her husband's leaving surgery now -- I know just what I'll do.
A six-hour delay sounds about right,
Then up every four hours for drugs all night.

Now the devil over-slept, while Pam got out of bed.
She got her kids off to school; now she's a step ahead.
She's rearranged her calendar, gone to Costco to order a cake.
Took a meeting to plan her son's college
(and no, she didn't stop to bake).

Took care of her ailing husband; did lots of nursing stuff.
She exclaimed, "What kind of deviltry
doesn't pay these nurses enough!?"
Well, that woke up our devil. He said "What have I done?
And now she's got hold of her briefcase,
She's got her power suit on!"

As she headed down the Pike,
the devil said "I'll get her when
she goes to testify for a committee,
where I still have some friends."

But Judiciary Oversight was no match for our Pam.
She handled them cooly, and slipped back into Mom-mode again.

The devil was getting mad, but he'd never beat Costco yet
so he let her pick up her cake, and said, "I'll stop her at the vet".
And made the dog act stubborn, and made him pee on the floor.
The devil sat back and cackled, "She'll never get out the door!"

But Pam is strong and wily. We know she goes to the gym.
She wrestled and cooed and chokeheld,
and finally persuaded him (the dog).

The devil said "I'm going crazy. I'm thwarted at every turn.
The day is almost over. I'm really starting to burn!"

"It's not my usual style. It don't have my usual class.
But I'm going to steal her wallet. That'll send her to her Aspirin."
But our intrepid Pam strode back into the night.
And found her wallet in the glow
of her guardian angel's spotlight.

Still there's homework to be done, and family to be fed.
And many miles to go before it's time for bed.
So once more to the gym, and lots more nursing stuff.
(And did she already mention, they don't pay nurses enough?)

One photo album left to build, some presents yet to wrap,
Before Pam can lay down for a short four-hour nap.
But the devil left, defeated. He's learned, to his surprise,
that he'll never beat a woman,
he'll never beat a woman,
he'll never defeat a woman
who's organized.

credits

from I've Got a Fire, track released November 15, 2013

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Englewood Oakland, California

Home-brewed, lo-fi music for grown-ups: making music for fun and non-profits.

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